Don't Make Me Turn This Quest Around
}} Roy attempts to quell intraparty fighting Cast * Roy Greenhilt ◀ ▶ * Belkar Bitterleaf ◀ ▶ * Durkon Thundershield ◀ ▶ * Vaarsuvius ◀ ▶ * Owlbear ◀ Transcript Vaarsuvius is covered in a goo from the owlbear digestive system. Belkar: Hey Roy, you're gonna leave that owlbear's head lying there? Belkar: C'mon, man! Give a hoot, don't pollute! Roy: Don't push it, Belkar. Remember, I still have the command word for your Mark of Justice. Vaarsuvius removes the goo with a spell. Vaarsuvius: Prestidigitation! Roy: Right now, I'm having trouble seeing why I shouldn't activate it and leave you writhing on the ground until another owlbear wanders by. Belkar: You're having trouble seeing—well let me paint you a friggin' picture. Belkar: That pointy-eared pissbucket has sef off 11 Explosive Runes spells on me since I woke up today—and that doesn't count the Fire Trap on the toilet lid. Belkar: All because he or she or it KNOWS that I can't fight back within the borders of a city, thanks to that stupid Mark of Justice crap. Durkon: Tha's not why V— Vaarsuvius: Silence. Roy: Is that true, Vaarsuvius? Did you cast Explosive Runes on him? Vaarsuvius: Technically, I cast Explosive Runes on a series of inanimate objects. Belkar: Well technically, it was the owlbear that ate you, asshat. Roy: Damn it! Vaarsuvius, I've told you before, we do NOT blow up other members of the party! Roy: And Belkar, I got you out of Shojo's jail on the premise that juvenile crap like this specifically wouldn't happen anymore. Roy: I am extremely disappointed in both of you. So I'm calling this thing even, as of right now. No more feud, so no more bodily harm. Roy: It's over. Roy: Do I have your word? It ends here? Belkar: Yeah. Vaarsuvius: Affirmative. Roy: OK then. Maybe we can get on with this adventure like adults. Just for a change of pace. Roy exits stage right. beat Belkar: Roy's Spot and Listen checks are too low to watch us all the time, you androgynous twit. Vaarsuvius: Your doom shall be swift and silent— Vaarsuvius: —like the owl. D&D Context * Explosive Runes is a 3rd level wizard spell that creates runes which explode on reading. The spell is a running gag in the comic, one Vaarsuvius won't cast again for more than 300 strips. * Fire Trap is another trap spell, this one 4th level, which can be triggered by opening an item. * The Greater Mark of Justice was placed on Belkar by Shojo sometime prior to #294. * Spot and Listen skills govern whether a player notices things. It has been firmly established that no one in the party has many ranks in these skills. * Prestidigitation is a 0th level spell that is capable of many mundane tricks, including cleaning one's clothes. Vaarsuvius uses it to remove the owlbear goo from their clothes. Trivia * "Give a hoot — don't pollute!" is the motto of Woodsy Owl, the mascot of the United States Forest Service. * This is the final appearance of the Owlbear, who first appeared in the previous strip. External Links * 323}} View the comic * 5465}} View the discussion thread Category:Uses Prestidigitation Category:The Oracle of Sunken Valley